I know Xmas is pretty much over, but don’t you have time for one last wish?  During the fall semester, I was blissfully unaware of the pop-culture horror known as Jersey Shoreand was pretty sure that “Guido” and “Guidette” were just racist slurs from a previous era. But no. Apparently, it’s an MTV phenomenon.

Santa, I’ll be honest.  My first introduction to Jersey Shore was an article on Jezebel.com.  Actually, the article was about Alyssa Milano’s new FunnyorDie.com video in which she spoofs (?) the concept behind Jersey Shore – as an Italian American native of the area.  Guess what – she doesn’t like the show, so technically, you’d be fulfilling 2Xmas wishes.   The comments section is worth checking out, it’s basically a giant debate about whether or not Milano was wearing black face. 

I just threw up, a little bit.

Now Santa, I understand that a lot of people find to this to be the best MTV entertainment since The Real World.  But do they have to get their kicks from a parody of a parody, thick with stereotypes without the moral punchline? At least the first few Real Worldsmanaged to encourage viewers to change a couple of their preconceived notions about AIDS victims, Mormons, and southern people.  Jersey Shore only makes me wonder how the mafia managed to gain as much power as it did.  Surely Al Capone would NEVER have worn lip-gloss like Pauly D.

And don’t even get me started on what this show is going to do to the women’s movement.  You thought Danielle Steele novels were bad… At least the “men” on the show are making as big of a**holes of themselves too.  It’s like a train-wreck.  Hideous and devastating, but I just can’t look away.

So Santa, please.  Bring back the days of the positive Italian stereotypes, a la New York native Dorothy Spornak and her spunky Sicilian mother, Sophia Patrillo. Yes, this is a Golden Girls reference.  But even the Simpsons managed to make an Italian joke both humerous and slightly tasteful.

I wish you a Merry Xmas and all that jazz.  But you know what’s at the top of my list this year.

My Best,

B.C.Bodnar